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Showing posts from May, 2011

Finally finished.

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Year 1 at college is DONE!!

Wooohooo!!!

Right, if we're getting technical, I've still got one last tutorial - a 10 minute one on one talk with the tutor to find out the results of my last 2 submitted projects, and to find out if I'm into year 2. A lot of us aren't worried about this - one of the projects is part 2 of something, so if you passed part 1, then you've passed the whole thing as the two grades just get added together. Plus, you can still fail two projects and get into year 2 anyway. Most of us have passed everything so far, so it wouldn't even matter if we failed the final project (But yeah, that would kind of be a kick in the balls). I actually finished on 20th May as that was the final hand in date, but I have been, in fact, sitting around doing fuck all since.

That people, is what I do best.

Msn is so boring now. I used to talk to Bree a lot on there. And whilst we hadn't talked for a little while due to her eye sight going, it was different …

RIP Bree

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Rest in peace doesn't seem right for Bree. She was always the loudest and brightest soul, so she'll definitely be the same no matter where she is now.

I know people are a bit confused by this, and I don't want to drag it out so I'll just keep it short.

In January, she contracted a neurological virus. It made her dizzy, and sick, and messed up her eye sight. Eventually, the dizziness started to fade but her eyesight got worse, to the point of being registered as legally blind. Then things just got worse from there. She was in and out of hospital a couple of times as they tried to figure out what was going on. And then suddenly out of the blue, I heard that she was in ICU and unresponsive. Next, was that she was on life support. A week ago, she was taken off life support but kept holding on. People got confused and thought that she'd passed away at this point; this wasn't true, but she was still unconcious and not really getting any better.

This morning, 25/5/11…

Ignorance is your new best friend.

I'm tired of being a voice that is never heard. No one believes a thing I say when it comes to the medical side. They're always the ones that are right. Fuck how I actually feel as long as they believe the bullshit they're spouting and my sats are good, what they say is basically gospel and MUST be right. Its so frustrating and has happened so many times its irritating. A massive example of this is the cipro argument:

I won't take it, I refuse to take it, b/c the last couple of times I took it (Last time was Jan last year) I felt like crap and finished the course not feeling any better, but almost worse, if anything. But I'd have my lung function tested and the numbers were good, a bit higher than they were just before starting it. So therefore it worked, regardless of how shit I feel. What everyone chooses to ignore, is that once the drug is out of my system, my LF will go back to what it started at, if not lower, and I'm still feeling just as lousy as ever. E…

Yet more driving adventures

Taking inspiration from Clarey and her blog post on car adventures, I've decided to make my own. And now I'm slightly worried considering the fact that I've only had my car almost a month now...

1) I've parked so close to another car that my passenger had to climb out of the drivers side as there wasn't enough room to open the door. In fairness I was parked fine in my bay, it was the person next to me who was parked basically on/over the lines...

2) Parking in a suitable not-too-far and not-too-close distance from the petrol pump to not look like, for lack of better words, a knob, is really difficult

3) Failing so badly on a parallel parking attempt that the front of my car was right up against the front of the car infront of me (so, number plate to number plate) I'd gone slow so there was no scratches or marks but GOD that was embarrassing. Especially the people who decided to stop and laugh.

4) Ticket machines. I've only had to try this once so far, at th…

B/c having a quiet, unembarrassing life, is overrated.

I've signed up for a Level 1 sign language course. This is big to me - for years I've refused to learn as I'd thought it was a way of maybe accepting the fact that I'm basically deaf. I hate it and fight with it every day, so learning something that essentially says to a lot of people 'I'm deaf' didn't appeal to me, even though on another level I knew I had to learn as it's a handy skill, not just deaf people know how to sign, and it'll make things like lectures easy as I can follow the signer rather than sit there clueless with no idea what is going on.

The course starts the week I finish my first year of the photography degree (and obviously, fuck-me-I-can't-believe-I-got-through-that). It's a fast track course so will be about 20 hours a week, and only takes 3 weeks. Theres assessments after each module to show you've learnt the stuff. The only thing I'm wondering is if I'll actually remember it - I have THE worst memory. …

Happy birthday Gem!

Woo, twenteen! Hope you have a brilliant day :) xx

So, I was *meant* to be having some sort of reflux test today. I got to the endoscopy unit, and proceeded to be incredibly unhelpful once called into the room. I realised what it entailed (tube down my nose, no thanks...) and didn't want it done, and was pulling every excuse possible - the fact that I feel like crap, have a cold, and have been coughing so much I'm bound to throw the stupid tube up at some point in the next 24 hours meaning it would be slightly pointless. Didn't work and eventually I realised I wasn't getting out of there easily. I felt it was kind of pointless though - its a test for reflux, I'm already on meds for reflux which I had to stop for 2 weeks for the test, and then I'd go back into the meds anyway. The bloke kept on about how it can determine if I'm getting the correct dosage but I don't exactly have a massive reflux problem anyway so I think the drugs I'm on now are doin…

Deactivation & driving adventures.

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I deactivated my facebook the other night. Not entirely sure why I did. In honesty it's like I've just cut myself off from a hell of a lot of communication, especially with other CFs as that's basically the main way (bar texts) that I talk to people, seeing as I don't go on the forums anymore and I'm inconvenient and can't talk on the phone. Oh well. The people who give a shit have my number so I can still talk to them :) Dunno how long it'll last for, probably only a few days tbh! I'll admit I still go and look at Loz's page, like, daily.

I'm not sure how I'm doing at the moment. I think I'm starting to go down the 'I need IVs' hill again. Yay. It's always gradual so it can be hard to tell. But the more and more frequent hemos are a nice smack in the face which remind you that *maybe* the lunguars are actually being diligent little drug addicts and want the hardcore stuff again. The taxi driver dropped me off at the lower b…

The list

Looking at my list, I've realised that a lot of things on it aren't that difficult to achieve, they're just the things you never bother to get round to doing.

Take yesterday for example : I went to Nandos.

Going to nandos was on my list. Mainly b/c I've heard so many people rave about it and I've never been before. Its not the most difficult thing to go there and order some food, I live near a few of them. But I'd just never gotten round to it. I went for lunch yesterday and I have no idea why I've never been before. They're so kind in there, and I'll be honest, it's not very often you get a restaurant with such nice staff. We said we'd never been before so they gave us a 20% discount which was unexpected coolness :) I'll definitely be going back. The fit waiter was just an added bonus on top of realllllly nice food!

Back to the list... I've decided to add a few more things onto it. Things that are more challenging and will actually …