Sunday, 11 September 2011

Insomnia

I know, I know. I've not blogged since the dinosaurs. Oops. I'm on IVs at the moment, after managing to go a full 3 months for the first time in what feels like a long time, and dare I say it, I almost felt like I could postpone the IVs even longer, if I wanted to. I didn't - college starts back on the 13th Sept and I want to feel as well as possible, unlike last year, when I finished them about a month before I'd even started, and began first year feeling like, for lack of other words, complete shite.

So far so good, these Ivs have done their job and the cough that was starting to crop up again got battered down, to sound less like a horrible chesty gremlin and more of a pathetic cough that does nothing. Problem is though, this pathetic cough is just a pointless tickly bastard that won't piss off, and seems to take a lot of breath with it, it's hard to describe. I think it might be down to the mini cold I caught on Saturday and it stayed for almost a week, but thankfully went away. I was drinking water with those vit C tablets in like there was no tomorrow.

I cough all night, its soooo irritating. Nothing works to stop it, not even the old faithful cup of tea. And alongside this, I have the mother of all insomnia. I don't know what triggered it, but for the last four nights I have gotten fuck all sleep, and it's starting to severely piss me off. I want to sleep, I'm shattered, right up until I close my eyes and try and sleep. Then BOOM, hellooooo sleepless night. I see every hour. It does my head in! I don't know why I can't sleep, I've gone through every logical thing I can think of - there's nothing bothering me, my meds haven't been changed, insomnia isn't a side effect of IVs and I've never had this problem before. There's nothing like sounds or lights keeping me awake, I don't drink coffee or down loads of sugar right before I sleep.

It just doesn't make sense.

On top of this, I can't seem to eat. I'm not hungry, and still try to eat but just can't. I haven't eaten a full meal in days and it's getting stupid. I'm not sure why, I think it's down to the 24/7 non stop tickly cough, as I feel sick from it and just not hungry at all. Even when I'm hungry I just can't seem to eat. It reminds me of when I was on cipro and loose my appetite completely. But I haven't touched the stuff in well over a year and a half. I went out for a meal on Thursday with some friends and barely ate my korma and chips (I love korma and chips beyond anything so I got really pissed off at myself, I wanted to eat the food, I just couldn't) so ended up having it packed up as a takeaway.

As college starts back so soon I NEED to fix myself. I just don't know how. I can hardly drive there and back when I feel like a zombie.

1 comment:

Gem said...

The lack of appetite is so frustrating! It's the biggest pain in the arse, and possibly what stresses me and my mum out the most. I find mega salty stuff works fairly well or strong tasting stuff. Sweet things just don't seem appealing because I think there is some kind of underlying feeling like you're gonna vom even if we're not aware of it. So yeah, things like crisps, toast, tuc biscuits and licking your arm (ok don't do that- you may attract odd looks) and possibly things like ice cream because the coldness kinda takes over the taste and the unappealing part of the food. Also how about oven chips? Cover them in salt and vinegar and they always somehow look and smell really good so are fairly easy to force down. It sucks though. In this situation fortijuice really doesn't help. Yes it's calories but they make your appetite disappear even looking at them!

The cough is irritating as fuck too especially at night! Could it be reflux? If I'm not hungry and haven't eaten much, I cough 10 times more because the stomach acid isn't being used to break down your food, so perhaps gaviscon could help a tidgey bit?

Insomnia drives me mad. What about Lavender on your pillow? They also sell herbal tablets over the counter that are supposed to aid sleep naturally but it's probably worth checking with a pharmacist that it definitely won't interfere with anything else you take.

Ok enough ranting and chatting shit from me!

Lovelovelove xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

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