I'm still here..!

I wish I had the energy to have a job but I know that isn't happening. I mean, even if I did, it's not like I'd manage to get one anyway. They always find reasons. Besides, its not necessarily the job I want (although, yes, being kept busy and not vegging out on the sofa would be nice...) it's more the money, haha. I'm currently out of £1,200 b/c of several reasons, one being the cost of the sign language course (which, by the by, I have completed, and LOVED it! It was fun, I learnt loads, and definitely made some amazing friends) The other reasons I'm just not really putting out there, b/c I don't feel like it mainly. Let's just say I've had way too much bad luck this year. I wish I could say I went on a massive spending spree or something, but no such luck... I'm pretty much just waiting on my next student loan, which won't be till I'm back for 2nd year, and also relying on my DLA payments, which have been fucked to hell. I checked my last statement and apparently I seem to be getting one load of payments every now and again, instead of the consistent 1 payment every week.

Dear bank balance, get well soon xxx

Anyway, yes, the sign language course was SO COOL! I was a bit annoyed that I had to pay for it when I found out the majority hadn't for various reasons (i.e. being on job seekers, various other benefits, or being under 19. Although they're scrapping that and everyone has to pay as of Sept 2011. Add that to the new uni students having to pay about 9 grand a year... Ouch. After all that, if I hear one more thing about unis or the government needing more money, I'll laugh so hard I'll be in danger of rupturing something) I learnt a hell of a lot more than I realised, and still remember a lot too. I won't be doing the level 2 course though, at least just yet, partly b/c it costs even more, and secondly b/c I just don't think I'd be able to juggle full time year 2 of photography, and a part time sign language course that lasts for a few months. So it looks like something I could do when uni is all finished and done with. And hopefully in the meantime I'll pick up and improve my own signing from the interpretors at college.

My last hosp appt was sometime in the middle of June, the day I started Sign language, so driving from college, straight to hospital, through busy busy Newcastle, was NOT something I was looking forward to. But it went fine, it just looks a lot scarier than it actually is. I was fine at that appointment and I'm pretty sure I'm still doing well now. I've had the odd crappy day which make me wonder if I'll really last until August 1st till I next have to be at clinic, but I'm so sick of that place, sick of IVs and drugs and weight bitches and everything, that I'd really rather not push it any further forward before I really need to. On another note, I applied to get my grubby little mitts on my hospital folders, as I'm weird and find them interesting, and I'd actually love to sit and read through the entire load of them, as theres so much I can't remember. I know it's hardly bedtime stories, but it's my past and I want to know what was said, especially back when I was a kid and was spoken about, rather than to. I saw a note in the front of my folder where my doctor had signed a piece of paper approving my request to see my notes, so YAY!

The bad luck thing I mentioned before... I'm not even kidding. I've had a pretty shit year since the second I turned 19, and that's no exaggeration. So many things just seem to go wrong. So I'm really hoping that when I turn 20, I can wave goodbye to all this shitty luck!

Hmm I didn't have much to say really! Just thought that after nearly a month of not blogging I should probably say something. Cos any longer and I was expecting thousands of people to flock at my house demanding to know if I'm still alive.

Obviously.

Oh and before I forget. I'm still meaning to sign up for this years zipslide. We've got to contact the woman over the phone, so naturally that means I have to delegate the task to someone else and erm... it's being procrastinated on just a shade. But once I'm signed up, I'll be making a justgiving once again and be pestering you all to sponsor me to stand on the edge of the baltic, not look down (hi fear of heights!!) but to zipslide along on a tiny piece of wire 200ft across the River Tyne.

Why do I do this to myself?!